When I wrote my last post in early January I made the assumption that no major world or personal event was going to derail any of my best laid “redirection of life” plans.  Actually, no conscious assumption of any kind was made, and why would it be?  Okay, so how many of you are smiling in smug self-righteous awareness right about now?

Reading my previous post — “The Redirection of My Life” — would help as background but, for a quick update, my plans included normal, ordinary, obtainable goals in the categories of nutrition/cooking, music, exercise, hobbies, and social engagements.  I had already made inroads in some.  I was off to a good start, complete with lots of enthusiasm.

First, and on a personal front, came what I’ll call “Prep for Surgery” which takes care of the Nutrition/Cooking category. 

Pretty much immediately following my public declaration way back then, Steve received confirmation that he would need a hip replacement and he was encouraged to lose some weight to help ease the current stress on his hip and in preparation for post-surgical recovery.  No problem!  I could also stand to lose a few pounds and I had the “research nutrition and change eating habits” under control; we were already eating better… or so I thought.  On January 21st — yes, a memorable day — we attended a metabolic clinic, recommended by our doctor, and discovered that some of what we thought was healthier (grains, legumes, fruits, and alcohol — wink, wink) is actually rich in carbs and not conducive to weight loss, or our particular health needs for that matter.  If we were serious, we would need to cut them out of our diet, or at least significantly reduce their consumption.  Just so we’re clear, I’m talking about fruits we love (apparently, the closer you get to the Equator, the more sugar, the less healthy), the legumes (that we hardly ever ate before but I had already started substituting for meat), pasta (regular or whole wheat), rice (white, brown, wild even), potatoes (white very bad, sweet a disputable better choice), and BREAD! 

Remember, one of my goals was to learn how to bake bread.  I had even purchased a stand mixer that was on sale last summer, specifically for bread making, and Steve had given me two beautiful bread making books for Christmas.  This could not be happening!  Thwarted before I even got started!  But… I love my husband and his health is important to me so we compromised a wee bit and decided to have only two pieces of toast with our breakfast.  No more sandwiches, no more chewy baguettes with cheese, no more soft Italian loafs to soak up delectable sauces on our dinner plates.  I even scoured different bread labels to find breads with 0-2 grams of sugar per two slices.  Yes, they are more expensive but so be it.

As if bread — the eating of it and the baking of it — wasn’t bad enough, can we also talk about pasta, rice, and potatoes?  THOSE DEFINE ME!!! There is no other way to describe those foods and what they mean to me. But… I love my husband and his health is important to me, so we gave them up, completely. 

I could go on, and on, and on, as what we eat has consumed me (see what I did there?) for the past six months.  I’ve had to re-research (is that a word?) nutrition and ended up settling on a modified version of Keto (which in its true form I think is somewhat militant and actually bordering on unhealthy), called LCHF (low carb high fat).  At first, this way of eating seemed counter-intuitive but the nutritionist is supportive and the results are in.  Since January 21st, Steve has lost 30 lbs and I have lost 20.  His blood pressure is under control, as is my blood sugar.  We both have energy and feel great.  We each have a few more pounds to lose to reach our respective weight goals, then we can transition to maintenance vs weight loss.  Of course, success can only be measured over the long term but, with my motivation restored and both of us committed, I’m very optimistic.

Now might be a good time to add that change of any kind does not come easy and a huge amount of effort is required to adjust and adapt. There have been many, many hours dedicated to research, not to mention meal planning and prep.  I’m convinced that this process would have been a nightmare, if not outright impossible, if I was still working.  There have been a few surprise positives to this redirection thing.

We have loosened our grip on how strict we are now, but not by much.  I’ve actually baked seven loafs of sourdough bread these past two months, not perfectly but I’m getting there (looks aren’t everything).  We’ve had a few meals with pasta in the same time period, and I’ve found desserts to make with little to no flour and/or sugar (and now I use sugar substitute).  We are adapting — harder for me than for Steve as I’m fussier — and I see no reason to fall off this wagon, ever. 

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By the way, we never did give up alcohol.  There is a limit to how much we’re willing to sacrifice!

Then, on the world front, came what I’ll call “COVID-19” which takes care of the Music, Exercise, Hobbies, and Socializing categories. 

What more can I say?  For us, the world stopped turning as of March 14th, our first day of self-isolation.

After trying a few different exercise classes at our local Rec Centre, I settled on only Zumba Gold and was attending classes twice a week.  I was even getting to the point where I was no longer flailing about and I could throw in some arms every once in a while without looking totally uncoordinated.  Call me slow, but I’m steady.  By the time exercise classes resume (not in a big hurry for that), I’ll likely be starting over.  Oh, well…

My grandson is now riding a two-wheeler so he and I have gone on a few bicycle rides together recently.  Other than gardening, that’s the extent of my exercise.

Speaking of gardening, I have three gardens — one in front and two in back.  They all needed attention this spring following a major landscaping project here last summer.  Ordering soil, mulch, and plants online was super-easy and very convenient — something I may consider doing again in future years (if not actually necessary).  It also helped that merchants waived delivery charges this year as an incentive to encourage any kind of revenue generating business.  I shoveled endless wheelbarrows full of soil and mulch into the backyard gardens over a couple of weeks, moved a couple of perennials around, planted a few more, hung some baskets, and decorated.  Then I came to a grinding halt.  It’s not that my front garden doesn’t look nice, it just hasn’t been topped up yet with the remaining soil and mulch.  It’s hot outside — that’s my excuse.  It will get done, eventually.  (Steve has already informed me that they can’t over-winter in the driveway.)  Besides, I don’t see my front garden so often anymore as we are hanging about in our backyard oasis.

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We’re on a bit of a green belt so it’s not unusual to see small wildlife in our yard, not to mention some pretty birds.

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Over many years I’ve dabble in stained glass.  I’ve made several items that I’m proud of — panels, lamp shades, candle holders, garden stakes — most of which I’ve gifted.  Those I consider my practice pieces.  Prior to the “end of days”, otherwise known as COVID, I had accumulated some interesting and appropriate lamp bases with a plan to dress them with homemade lamp shades — to sell — when I retired.  I have one shade and two other projects about half finished and can’t continue until I can get my hands on some more supplies.  I’m also in no hurry to step inside that store yet and online shopping is not appropriate as I need to actually see and touch before buying.  Guess my potential little cottage business will have to wait. 

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Thank goodness for FaceTime! or we would have had no social life at all!  Our weekly pub night turned into virtual pub night and that continued until about two weeks ago when we started social distancing, with take out food, on our respective decks.  Then we tried a patio! Thank you Tim and Julie for dining with us each week.  We also connected with other friends and family, with varying degrees of frequency, by phone or video chat.  And, we had a back yard BBQ with other friends last weekend.  I’m on the introverted end of the personality spectrum, and am happy with my own company, to the point where I’m working on book #14 (since the new year) in Elizabeth George’s Inspector Lynley murder mystery series.  But the restrictions placed on us as a result of this pandemic have proven that consistent social interaction is more important to me than I would have thought.  I missed my friends and family and am happy to be carefully reintroducing some social engagements.

Family… my sisters live on the west coast so I’m used to visiting with them via FaceTime or texting.  My daughter, son-in-law, and grandson, however, live an hour away and we were used to seeing them mostly every week.  It was very difficult to be so close yet so far away.  We had a couple of distanced visits then, about a month ago, while visiting on our deck, Yelena and I had a hug.  What an emotional hug that was — no pictures of sobbing mother and daughter.  Then Odin was given permission to hug his Amma and Baba.  Such a happy day!  Since then, we have been thrilled to have Odin overnight twice in the past three weeks and we went to his house for Canada Day celebrations.  For me, that’s as normal as it needs to be for now.

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That just leaves an update on our music, which plays a very important role for both of us.  Our last weekly jam session at our club was March 10th.  We haven’t been back yet and feel it will be quite some time still before we return.  Apparently, it’s not advisable to be enclosed in a 20’ x 20’ room, with the door closed, with 6-8 people, most of whom are singing, despite whatever protocols and precautions have been put in place.  And, as the weather warms up, we turn fans on to help with air circulation — just what a nasty airborne virus loves!  That doesn’t mean we haven’t had music in our lives and, in some cases, in other’s lives as well, because of our performances.  Performances, you ask? 

The week following lock-down, Steve suggested that we alter the words to a few songs, record them, and post them on Facebook — same as what some others were doing online. I was a little reluctant at first but, as we worked through the process of “COVIDing” the songs we chose, it became more appealing. After all, they would be audio only so no one would be able to see us (me). We also did a tribute to Kenny Rogers. In the midst of that, though, while hanging about our living room with our instruments, Steve also suggested we do a little performance for Odin, our 3 1/2-year-old grandson. 
Me: “Oh, you mean on FaceTime.” 
Steve: “No, Facebook live!” 
He gave me about 15 minute’s notice; any longer and I would have had time to really think that through and politely decline.  We played five kiddie songs and it went well enough.  We even had a few FB friends, other than Odin’s parents, watch and comment.  No one boo’d us off the virtual stage. 

Don’t Worry Be Happy  (March 20)

The Gambler, A Tribute (March 22)

Odin’s Performance (March 23 – Facebook Live)

COVID Busters (March 24) 

Then came Steve’s master plan. 
Steve: “Let’s do Facebook live again, set it up as an event with lots of notice so we can attract more people, and perform for half an hour.” 
Me: “What!? You’re joking, right?” 
He was not joking.  This was far from attractive for me but, I love my husband and care about his (emotional) health, so sucked it up and said okay.  What’s the worst that could happen — it’s just family and friends? 

From March 29th to June 7th, we have performed 8 times, live.  We started out in our living room with acoustic instruments and an iPad, then introduced amplified electric instruments and microphones, still in the living room and still with an iPad.  Then, because we were getting SO cocky, we moved into our family room (aka our music production studio), plugged whatever instruments we were playing into bigger amplifiers, continued with the microphones, and engaged with new audio/video software that sometimes worked better and sometimes didn’t. (Recording to Facebook Live is a bit tricky, which is why we appear to be playing left-handed in some of the events.)

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All of this was never my idea — I like to fly under the radar — but have to confess that it’s been a fun learning curve.  Steve’s finger picking, lead lines, and singing have improved.  I’ve mastered many chords on my new baritone ukulele, well enough to play it for several songs, and have improved my playing overall.  Too often I heard “you have to turn your volume up and carry the rhythm so I can hear you”.  Those were terrifying words as I’m primarily a singer, and when I play with others, who are accomplished guitarists, I just plunk away and fade into the background.  No one can hear my mistakes.  But I think I rose well enough to the challenge.  (Some of these are better than others and ignore the very unprofessional uncertainty at the start of each session wondering whether we were live or not…)

Songs For Our Family (March 29)

Duets (April 5)

Comfort Zone Songs (April 12)

Rock (April 19)

British Invasion Part 1 (April 26) — unfortunately, this can no longer be found on Facebook – no idea why…

Folk (May 3)

Beatles, The Early Years (May 13)

Mix It Up (June 7)

We will perform live again, but not necessarily with any kind of regularity.  The nice weather is interfering with our practice sessions.  We do take pleasure, though, in playing on our deck for ourselves.  When we’re ready, we’ll set up another event, with appropriate notice.

So, six months later…
As uncertain as I was about this new phase of my life, it’s turning out to be just fine.  Seems my identity and my value are still intact.  I’m making my way through my list of plans/goals; maybe a little slower than I thought because of COVID and the lock-down.  Perhaps I was meant to retire when I did as I’m now imagining work getting squarely in the way of everything else I want to do.  And COVID?  Through forced isolation, I believe I’ve been given permission to slow down and smell those proverbial roses.

Stay healthy — keep washing your hands and don’t forget to respect yourself and others by continuing to wear your mask if you can’t social distance!